Yes I hear it every day, “I know basically WHAT I need to do but I don’t know HOW-TO actually do it”.
Why is change so hard?
It is hard because we are wired to continue choosing the known- the comfortable.
It is not your fault if you are having trouble making the changes you desire to make.
After choosing a certain way for a long time our brain literally becomes wired to choose that more easily in the future. It keeps us safe. It keeps us comfortable. Even if the choice is something super bad for us like choosing to eat ice cream every night at 10p.m..
You know your goal is to feel better and you know that dairy makes you feel terrible and you know that when you eat late you feel groggy the next day. Yet, every night at 10 p.m. this evil part of you comes out and goes to the freezer and sits and eats at least a pint of ice cream. Afterwards you feel guilty and tell yourself you will never do that again. Tomorrow, will be different!
Then tomorrow comes and you do the same old thing getting the same old results. And as you know you need to do something new to get a new result.
Again, this is not your fault. You knowing the outcome of eating the ice cream keeps you feeling safe and comfortable and therefore, that is the best choice- at least from the brain’s perspective.
How DO you CHANGE?
Change is actually very simple when you know the science of change. Yes, the science of change is actually a science. I believe it is an art and science!
Here is what you need to do:
- Decide it is time for the change.
- Clearly write down the change.
- Create a vision in your mind of the end result of this change. For instance, if the change you desire to make is to stop eating ice cream then the end result may be you feeling awesome moving your body every day at your ideal weight.
- Write this vision down as if you are living it and feeling it! Feel into the emotions and sensations in your body. What are you thinking, wearing, doing…?
- Map out exactly what your day will look like. What will you do at 10 p.m. instead of grab the ice cream? Vision it. Feel into it.
- Track you doing it for 45 days straight.
- Recommit every day over and over and over!
There is plenty more but this will get you started.
If you or your workplace, organization or community want support and guidance to implement changes, connect with me at firstname.lastname@example.org or 202-320-5025.
Kelly- Your Healing Life Design Coach